2 Samuel 13:20
And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house.
2 Samuel 13:20 (KJV)
Context
Absalom speaks to Tamar after their half-brother Amnon has violated her (2 Samuel 13:1-19). His question confirms what happened, and his command to “hold now thy peace” reflects the cultural expectation that a woman should remain silent about such shame. This was not comfort but pressure to hide the crime. Absalom’s words minimize the offense and urge Tamar to suppress her trauma.
Meaning
The phrase “regard not this thing” means “do not take it to heart” or “do not dwell on it.” Absalom tells Tamar to dismiss the offense as if it were unimportant. The Hebrew word for “desolate” (shomem) conveys devastation, loneliness, and ruin. It shows that Tamar lived in ongoing grief and isolation, not just temporary sadness. Absalom offers no justice, no comfort, and no public vindication. Instead, he silences her and hides the crime within the family.
Biblical connections
Absalom’s response sets the stage for later events. The narrative soon records his planning of Amnon’s murder (2 Samuel 13:22-29). Unresolved sin and suppressed pain lead to further destruction, as David’s household spirals into chaos and rebellion. This silence does not bring peace; it plants seeds of vengeance.
Application
This verse warns against minimizing sin or silencing victims. Absalom’s failure shows the danger of hiding wrongdoing. Believers are called to respond to sin with truth and compassion, not concealment. When sin is hidden, it grows and harms the whole community. We must also care for those who suffer, offering comfort and seeking justice rather than turning away.
Reflection
Tamar’s desolation reminds us that human responses to evil often fail. Absalom’s private revenge only deepened the tragedy. Only a righteous judge can bring true justice. Christ sympathizes with the brokenhearted and will one day right all wrongs, offering hope that no earthly silence can provide. In our own lives, we can trust Him with pain that others have ignored.
